Tuesday 10: Bachelorette Style
Shenanigans and things we learned, in no particular order. 10. Porsche people are weird and they leave their ugly shirts on your car. 9. Exposed teeth is always in interesting topic of discussion. 8. It's inevitable, one of the hotel rooms will always end up the designated party room. No one knows how this comes about, but it'll happen. If you were lucky enough to sleep in the non-party room, you'll wake up smelling like bath & body works and your room will look better than the day you got there. If you got screwed and the party room is your room, you'll wake up smelling aromas of old pizza and beer. And there won't be any clean towels. 7. It isn't a successful girls trip if someone (or everyone) doesn't breakdown and cry. 6. Getting Bill to be your wine tour guide will the best decision of your LIFE. 5. When you recap the whole weekend on your drive back Sunday afternoon and someone says, "Oh, I don't remember any of that", you know it was a good trip. 4. Twerking in a winery. And on a bus. For two+ hours. Don't. Do. It. As much as you think other folks want you to teach them, they probably don't. They saw Miley. They know what twerking is. 3. You'll start out sipping and tasting the wine with opinions like, "I prefer something a bit less sweet, or less dry, perhaps". A couple hours in, you'll be all, "yeah I'll try whatever you got." Then, eventually, you'll reach the point where you're drinking from the bottle(s) and eating pizza you have no idea where it came from. 2. Always, always hire a high school guy, who has a van, who will keep a head count on an hourly basis, to drive you around. He'll save your life and then take you to McDonalds. 1. And some unidentified quotes for you: "It's only okay to get a boob job if you're doing it for yourself and no one else." "Oh, it'll be for her because her boobs are jacked up." "You guys are so much cooler than I though you'd be!" "I kinda like her now, she turns into a bitch when she's drunk." "Exposed teeth? Like on TLC?" "My milkshake will be at Luckenbach" "We're as normal as they come" "I don't want anyone to know I was with y'all"